We are socially and culturally encouraged to be “with”… not alone. Having many friends, being social, connecting with community, and being part of the village are common promotions. So naturally people are afraid to be alone, to be tagged as loner or wierd or anti social. While most men embraces their freedom, most women on the other hand are very much scared to be alone.
Is being with Mr. Wrong much better than being alone ??. While Feminism is big right now but still there is a majority of young women population who would choose to be in an unhealthy relationship rather than taking the way out. Most of these women are strong and financially independent women who can easily leave but still they choose to be with unfaithful, withdrawn and abusive partner.
When women get into relationship just for the reason that don’t want to be alone.They do things all the wrong way. They try to control their partner or others with anger, blame, tears or compliance. They put up with intolerable or abusive behavior. They do rationalize that, no matter how bad it is, it is better than being alone. They feel as if they can’t go on if they end up alone. None of these make sense you are not a child who is left alone in the darkness, you are grown women who can get up and walk out and live in the light if you choose to. All that need to be said is NO.
We only feel alone when we abandon ourselves. We may feel lonely when we want to share love with another and there isn’t anyone there, or the other person is closed to connection. But being lonely is a fact of life. It can occur within a relationship or without. In fact, Most women are extremely lonely in their relationship, perhaps more lonely that they would have been had they been alone. Women are willing to tolerate the deep loneliness and heartbreak to avoid being alone.
There’s heightened focus today on relationships: how to have healthy ones, how to date, celebrity break-ups and hookups, contentious divorces and parenting conflicts. There’s massive professional advice flowing on how to do it all better. Does relationship with self therefore get the short shrift? There is a flaw if intimate connection with self does not get the same richness or urgent attention. The inner portrait of each person and their own creative spark and aliveness is often found in solitude. It can then can be energetically focused outward in important and loving relationships. It may even clear your thoughts about what is healthy for you. “Sometimes it takes darkness and the sweet confinement of your aloneness to learn that anything or anyone that does not bring you alive is too small for you.” -David Whyte
Sure, relationships need work but that work doesn’t mean you be end up in bruises. Women can takeover the world leave alone a man.( Like the new Shawn Mendes song says, any girl like you deserves a gentlemen so let’s find someone who “Treat You Better”). Just be brave and be sure of what you don’t want. It may be hard but you have to give it a try. You deserve to be treated right and nothing less. Go for love, don’t settle for anything else.
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